Englisg

Itni english mujhe bhi aati hy.

I will yaad u very ziyada.

U B yaad me bohat much.

U r very ziyada good dost of me.

I think i m B ache friend of u.

So plz don't bholna me.

mai also kabhi b nai 4get u.

Apni Care Rakhna!

How lagi my english...

Before and After Marriage

Boy's Room before Marriage:

-Perfumes
-Love Letters
-CD Player & Cds.
-Greetings Cards.
-Air Freshner.
-Different Sims Along Different Pakages With 1 Mobile.
-Books of poetry
-PEACE.

After Marriage:

-Pain Killers.
-Loan Papers.
-Unpaid Electricity & Gas Bills.
-Medical Reports.
-Empty Wallet.
-Feeder, Nipple & Pampers, qarshi ka instant joshanda, ispghol ka chilka, qareeb aor door ki ainak, poly color, aor bed k sarhaney book "Maut Ka Manzar":

Tere wale

Ladki apne room me
baith kr zor zor se ro rhi
thi...
Maa ne ye dekha to
uske paas ayi aur boli..!
Maa: kya hua beti kyu ro
rhi ho, mujhe btao
main teri DOST hoon..
Beti rote huye..
.
.
.
.
.
.
Kya batau yar,
.
Apne wale ko milne gyi
thi,
.
Tere wale ne dekh liya
aur boht maara.. :-P

Banana

Lady 2nd floor se banana wale ko dekh kr pochti hai ‘kela kesy dega?’
banana wala, mem sahab 8 me 12
Lady. 7 me 13 longi
deta hai to upar aaja..

No need to explain....

Samaj me aaya ho to like karo... That's it

Degrees of girls!

Degrees of girls!
B.A.-Beautiful Angel
B.E.-Beautiful Eyes
B.Sc.-Beautiful Structure
B.Com-Beautiful Communication
M.B.A.-Married But Awesome!

Real 911 Calls

emergency-call

BELIEVE it or not , These are REAL 911 Calls!

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency? Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner. Dispatcher: Do you have an address? Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency? Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich . Dispatcher: Excuse me? Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it. Dispatcher: Was anything else taken? Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I’m sick and tired of it!

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency? Caller: I’m trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn’t have an eleven on it. Dispatcher: This is nine eleven. Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one Dispatcher: Yes, ma’am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing. Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I’m not stupid.

My Personal Favorite!!! Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What’s the nature of your emergency? Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart Dispatcher: Is this her first child? Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

And the winner is……….

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 Caller: Yeah, I’m having trouble breathing. I’m all out of breath. Darn….I think I’m going to pass out. Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from? Caller: I’m at a pay phone. North and Foster. Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic? Caller: No Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing? Caller: Running from the Police.

Saying Goodbye to Mother

SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER......

You don't have to own a cat to appreciate this one! You don't even have to like 'em!

We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house. The cat we put out in the back yard, scoots back into the front door.

We didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird. My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.

Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, 'He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to my mother.'

A few minutes later, I get into the cab. 'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as we drove away. 'That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!

The cab driver hit a parked car.