Little Johnny's class were on an outing to their local police station
where they saw pictures, of the ten most wanted men, tacked to a
bulletin board. On the way out of the police station Little Johnny said
to the officer, "it was so nice of you to put my daddy's picture up
there."
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The photographer for a national magazine was assigned to get photos of
an enormous forest fire. Smoke at the scene was too thick to get any
good shots, so he frantically called his home office to hire a plane.
"It will be waiting for you at the airport!" he was assured by his editor.
As soon as he got to the small, rural airport, sure enough, a plane was
warming up near the runway. He jumped in with his equipment and yelled,
"Let's go! Let's go!" The pilot swung the plane into the wind and soon
they were in the air.
"Fly over the north side of the fire," said the photographer, "and make three or four low level passes."
"Why?" asked the pilot.
"Because I'm going to take pictures! I'm a photographer, and
photographers take pictures!" said the photographer with great
exasperation and impatience.
After a long pause the pilot said, "You mean you're not the instructor?"
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Two guys were fishing down by the Ohio River on different sides of the
riverbank at night. Guy number one was catching a whole bunch of fish
for his family, but guy number two hadn't caught any and was frustrated
and called out to guy number one "How come you've been catching all them
there fish and I ain't caught a single one?"
Guy number one replied, " I don’t know.... why don’t ya come on over here?"
"I don’t know.... I don’t see a bridge, and their aint no boat, and I don’t swim to well"
Guy number one picks up his flashlight, turns it on, and replies, " Why don’t you walk across this here beam off light?"
Guy number two was outraged and replied "do you think am stupid? When I get half way you'll turn it off!!!"
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